🛑 This chapter is not suitable for anyone under the age of 18 🛑
____________________
. . . GIBSON'S POV . . .
____________________
The looks on their faces, the way that their arms dropped from holding one another, the sense of a slight fear creeping up their spines, I loved it all. The rain from the storm outside tapped heavily against the roof of the bakery, but the silence within it was deafening as I continued to sit in my chair, staring at them. A small grin sprung to my lips as I watched their discomfort, assuming they were still in shock from seeing me and I decided to repeat my question.
"I suppose I'll ask again.. I wasn't interrupting anything important, was I? I'd hate to intrude on your alone time together. I would be so embarrassed.." I began with a little humor, though I'm sure they had no idea I was only amusing only myself.
"N-No, of course not.. He was just.. Helping me move around some heavy boxes.." She lied and I chuckled, though not loud enough for either of them to hear, "W-What are you doing here..? Where are the kids?" Hannah wondered about first and I kept my smirk, finding it rather amusing that she continued to deny what I already knew had happened behind that storage room door. She must've thought that I had just gotten here.
"They're fine, they're at Nina's.. They're having a sleepover because I don't think either of us will be coming home tonight," I replied.
"W-What..?" She asked, confused by my words, but before I could answer her, even though I didn't even plan to, Gareth took a step forward.
"Gibson, this isn't what it looks like.." Gareth spoke and I laughed.
"It isn't? Then what's your excuse for all of this? Do you honestly think I'm that stupid? Oh, wait, that's right.. Silly me, I always get the sound of you helping my wife move around 'heavy boxes' and the sound of her orgasm confused," I replied angrily with sarcasm and I stood from the chair offensively, Gareth taking a step forward in front of Hannah and I knew that from what I had said, they could assume that I knew the truth now.
"Really? You of all people are protecting my wife? From what, Gareth? You're worse than I am and you know it.." I threatened through my clenched teeth.
"Sounds like to me you're looking to take that torch and I don't want that to happen right now. Let's just calm down, okay..? Let's go somewhere and talk about this, you and me," he offered as a compromise and I scoffed lightly.
"Nah, right here is just fine. I'd like to ask just a few simple questions to help speed up this process and to help me understand all of this," I spoke with a sense of calmness and Gareth lowered his guard just slightly, "Oh, and I'd like the truth the first time, if I have to ask again, well.. Let's just say you really don't want me to.." I continued, seeing that I had both of their full attention now.
"How long?" I asked in a demanding tone, seeing both of them grow reluctant to answer and they were silent for a few long seconds, though Hannah spoke up first to my surprise.
"Three years," she replied and just by the look in her eyes, I knew she was telling the truth. My lips parted slightly and I exhaled heavily at the amount of time I had been oblivious until today. I had my suspicions, but I didn't actually act on them until this past week when I got Ezra involved, and I didn't get the truth until about half an hour ago from him. But, three years..? Then that meant..
"Camilla's not mine, is she?" I more stated than asked and Gareth looked over his shoulder towards Hannah, both of us watching as she shook her head 'no' and confirmed my assumption.
"Is she Gareth's?" I continued and I watched as Gareth looked to me in confusion and shock, then back towards Hannah. She hesitated a moment, looking between Gareth and I a few times and finally she nodded 'yes'.
"W-What..?" Gareth asked her, taking a step back and away from her and she began to panic a little.
"I-I.. I'm sorry.." Hannah said in a desperate manner and I looked to Gareth.
"Don't act like you didn't know.." I threatened him and he turned towards me.
"I didn't know!" Gareth replied angrily, staring me down for a moment and his response was actually a little believable.
"Put two and two together, dumbass.. Camilla's less than three years old and from what I can assume, you've been with Hannah a lot more than I have in those years.. You know, while I was working thirteen hour days, babysitting Oliver and Camilla while at my job, the job I was sacrificing my time with them so I could provide for them, all while you two were having the time of your lives," I replied.
I looked down at the money on the table top next to me and ran my fingertips over one of the stacks, "Gareth just comes along and flashes a few stacks of money in front of your nose and you take the easy way, without me.. You take the money, this.. Dirty money, without telling me.. And then, on top of that-" I looked back up to Hannah, "As a thank you for his generosity, you fuck him, leaving me in the dark.." I continued, seeing Hannah break her gaze from me and she hung her head as she cried softly.
I didn't know what was wrong with me right now, it still felt as if I was calm when I knew I should be feeling so much more than this.. A nuke had just landed in my lap, yet it seemed as if I was impervious to it.
"Gibson, I'm sorry.. I truly am," Hannah spoke with a genuine yet shaky tone and I changed my demeanor, my expression growing softer.
"I loved you, Hannah.. I thought you were the one and I thought you felt the same about me. We'd been hurt in the past, we were sick of not being treated the way we felt like we should be, and then.. You threw it away, like it was nothing.." I replied, watching her look up to me again and she stepped a little closer towards me.
"I still love you, I'm just.. I was so confused, I was so lonely without you, but you weren't there for me! For us! I tried to tell you, I tried to make you see what it was doing to me, but you just kept insisting that that's what was best for us.. All you did was care about your job.."
"I cared about my job so much because it's what helped me take care of my family!" I spat back angrily, "I sacrificed so much so that you and the kids could have everything you needed or wanted.. I know I wasn't there a lot, you made sure to rub that in my face every chance that you could get.. But.. What, you think I liked being away from my family? You think I preferred work? Don't be so fucking stupid, Hannah.. You've known from the very beginning that I wanted children, why the hell would you think I liked being away from them!? From you?!" I continued to yell and she only grew more upset, her expression beginning to show regret and it's as if my words had finally sunk in after all these years and she realized how unfair she's been for the first time, ever since these arguments had started.
"..I'm so sorry I've been so weak, for everything that I've done.. Nothing like this will ever happen again.. I'll stick it out with you, I want this to work, Gibson," she replied and I looked in her eyes, noticing the genuine glint they held and I lifted my hand towards her.
"Come here.." I requested and Hannah let out a relieved sigh, he expression matching the same relief and she walked towards me.
"Hannah, wait.." Gareth pleaded, as if sad that she hadn't chose him over me, but she ignored him completely and continued, stopping in front of me.
I lifted my hand and I gently caressed her face, feeling her warm skin and I watched her shut her eyes, pressing her cheek against my hand a little more and enjoying my touch. I missed touching her like this, in such a sensual and loving way. I couldn't remember the last time we'd done this.. I studied her face, noticing she was somewhat happy and I watched her open her eyes again, looking up to me with tears still running down her cheeks and I smirked towards her, running my thumb under her eye and wiping the evidence of sorrow away even though her tears kept coming.
"D-Does.. Does this mean you forgive me?" Hannah wondered, hope in her glistening blue eyes and I chuckled warmly with a smirk on my lips.
"Aw.. No, sweetheart," I replied with sincerity, removing my hand from her face and I reached back into my waistband.
I pulled out the pistol, pulling the hammer back quickly and I put the end of the barrel against the underneath of her jaw, hearing her gasp suddenly when the cold metal touched her warm, delicate skin, "You can ask for forgiveness when you're in hell," I replied with a stern, confident tone and her eyes widened in shock, but before she could answer me, a loud, deafening crack of thunder simultaneously roared over the sky as I pulled the trigger. Blood spat upward and decorated the ceiling and I watched as her body went limp and fell to the ground.
"HANNAH!" Gareth called out in horror, beginning to run towards her and I pulled the hammer back once more within a split second, shooting Gareth in the left knee and he let out a cry in pain, falling face first to the ground.
"Ahhh! Fuuuck, fuck, fuck, fuck..!" He called out in agony, his hands going to his knee and holding it gingerly as I listened to his suffering moans.
I lowered the gun, watching as blood began showing through the fabric of his jeans by his knee and his hands grew shaky as he wished desperately that he could hold his knee to dull the pain, but he couldn't. I took in a deep breath, letting it out slowly and I tilted my head as I looked down at him, seeing him rocking gently back and forth as he continued to express the amount of pain he was in.
"Y-You.. You fucking killed her! H-How could you do that?!" He called out, watching him look towards Hannah and his expression began to twist into a gentle sorrow. Gareth began to crawl slowly and he reached out towards her, but before he could touch her, I pulled back the hammer once more and lifted the gun, shooting his hand dead center.
I heard him let out another cry in pain and he pulled it back and coddled his hand against his chest, "I think you've touched her enough today.." I said with a stern tone as I watched him lying on the ground in pain, then using his uninjured left hand and his unscathed right leg to quickly push himself away from her body and also away from me.
I looked to Hannah, lying there motionless on the ground as wet, crimson blood quickly pooled around her head. I looked to her legs, admiring them one last time and remembering how much I loved them, but I still felt it was strange that I didn't feel any guilt for what I had done, I felt more accomplished than anything else..
Just like old times..
I bent down next to her body, reaching out and my fingertips caressed down from her thigh to her mid calf, enjoying her smooth skin that was already beginning to turn cold.
"Did you really have to take her from me? Do you even know what love is..? Have you ever felt that before?" I wondered, looking up and over towards Gareth and he was leaning up against the half wall not too far from me, holding his injured hand.
"I-I.. I can't be sure.." Gareth replied with a struggle through his pain, his voice shaky and uneven.
"You didn't at least feel it with her? ..With Hannah?" I asked and I noticed him hesitate a moment, though still unable to give me a straight answer.
"I.. I don't know, okay..?"
"If you don't know, then you never did.. So.. Why did you? If you didn't love her, then why? How could you do that to me, even after knowing how much it had hurt me the first time..?"
"I-I.. I don't kn-"
"Stop telling me you don't fucking know!" I yelled angrily, standing straight up again and I lifted the gun, pointing it at Gareth.
"Gibs, no! Please! Please, don't!" He pleaded, holding up his uninjured hand and he turned his head away from me, unable to watch his own brother end his life. "Please, Gibs.."
"I knew.. I knew she was the one and you see one little opportunity to plant yourself in her life that you had no business being a part of! You took advantage of me, of her, of our situation.. You couldn't just leave me the hell alone, could you!?" I continued yelling, stepping around Hannah and walking closer to Gareth. "So, why? Why did you do it!"
Gareth's head turned towards me slightly, lowering his hand only a little and looking up to me with a pathetic expression, "..N-Now that I think about it, I-I might've been jealous.. I never wanted a normal life like you, I never wanted a wife, or kids, or anything serious at all.. All I wanted was to live with you and do what we do best," he replied, letting out another tone of despair and adjusting his injured leg just slightly through his pain, "I was jealous of the ones that were able to take you away, so I took them from you in hopes you'd see that I'm the only one you can rely on.."
"Well.. You didn't realize that it caused you more harm than good, case in point, how you're lying on the ground now, how my wife, your lover, is dead, and how I'm never going to speak to you ever again after this," I answered, seeing him look to me and his eyes showed panic.
"What..? Wait.. No, Gibs.." He replied, his tone a little desperate and I pulled back the hammer of the gun, "Gibs, don't!" He begged as he lie there.
I heard a roar of thunder crash outside and I shot Gareth in the right shoulder at the same time, hearing him call out in agony after the thunder had passed and he gripped his shoulder in pain. "P-Please, Gibson! Stop this!" He continued to beg and he let out more signs of suffering as he held his shoulder. The lightning following the thunder illuminated the bakery momentarily, watching as the blood already spilled on the floor glistened quickly from the sudden light. Though I still felt bits of anger and resentment, I continued to feel calm, collected, and at ease.. Like this was meant to happen.. Like I was meant to leave it all behind in order to have the normal life I craved so much. I had to leave everything, and everyone.
I quickly walked towards Gareth and bent down in front of him, grabbing the top of his head by his long hair and I forced him to look at me, hearing him continuing to breath heavily and he let out a gentle groan of pain every so often, "We will never be the same again.. I don't ever want to know that you're looking for me, and I never want to see your face again," I exclaimed, putting the gun to his cheek threateningly, "Are we at an understanding?" I asked angrily.
"Gibs.. Please.." Gareth pleaded once again and I pressed the barrel more into his cheek.
"Do I have to put this in your mouth and pull the trigger for you to understand?" I threatened, seeing him look down towards the gun, then back up to my eyes. He stared at me for a long moment, "You know I'll do it," I threatened again.
"..If you meant it, you would've killed me already," he replied, still staring me dead in the eyes and I swallowed hard, unable to comprehend how he was still able to have this hold over me, to still be able to control me even though I was the one with the weapon, the one with the upper hand, the one running this show.
"I hate you," I replied angrily, seeing his expression change from a slight confidence to a gentle sorrow and his eyes read as if he wished I regretted my words, but.. I didn't. I put my thumb against the back of the hammer and pushed it forward, clicking the safety on after and tucking the gun back within the waistline of my pants against my spine.
So, this is how it ends. Me being forced to abandon everything that I am, abandoning everyone I know and love and skipping town. I was too much of a coward to turn myself in or risk getting caught, it was in my blood not to, it was the one thing Gareth and I had promised we'd never let happen, and every time we killed together, we only got better and better at avoiding the consequences behind our actions. Why would I let myself get caught now? I was sloppy this time around, my prints are everywhere and I'm even leaving behind an eye witness, but I just couldn't bring myself to kill Gareth.. Even after all he's done..
I thought of Oliver, the one thing in this life that I never once regretted and I hated myself for leaving him behind, but I couldn't face him.. I just hoped he was old enough to understand why all of this had happened, and that I, in the end, wasn't the one to blame.
I watched as his regretful expression turned into a calmed one from me putting the gun away, though as he watched me, standing up from my crouched position, there, in this silence with him, I knew he could finally tell I was serious.
"You r-really mean it.. You're leaving me, for good this time.. I-I'm never going to see you again.. Am I..?" He asked, seeing him staring up at me and his eyes were filled with regret, despair, and even anger.
"No.. You won't.." I confirmed for him.
"..I.. I'm sorry, Gibson.. I deserve all of this.. But, I-I'll do anything.. W-What can I do to m-make it up to you..?" Gareth asked, his voice getting more uneven than before and I knew he was losing a lot of blood.
"You get to explain to my son why he doesn't have any parents anymore, you get to tell him why all of this happened and how you are the worst person that anyone could have in their life, you need to make sure that he knows I love him.. And.. And you need to give me a head start," I replied sternly, seeing Gareth wincing in both pain and the meaning behind my words, "Do you have your phone on you?" I ask and he nods, "If you're still alive, call an ambulance in ten minutes.. I need to get a few things from house before I leave for good," I requested and Gareth stared at me for a long moment, as if taking one last look at me, then nodding in agreement to my request.
I turned around and made my way towards the door, but stopped when I heard Gareth, "Gibs, wait.." He said desperately, turning my head slightly to let him know he had my attention, though I didn't look over my shoulder to see him.
"What.." I asked sternly.
"D-Do you.. Do you really hate me?" Gareth asked softly, letting out another groan in pain as he waited for my answer.
My insides were twisting as I stood there, feeling his eyes on me and I honestly didn't know what to say. When I had said it earlier, I was saying it out of anger, though now that everything has finally sunk in, looking at everything laid out before me, I didn't know how to answer him. I hated him for ruining my life, for taking the woman I loved, for causing me to go to such extreme lengths so I could let out this much needed frustration and urge to spill blood, but.. As stupid as I was for thinking this, we've been together since the moment we took our first breaths of air and I could never hate what we used to have. His excuse for ruining everything wasn't just, nor did it make sense, it just made him look even more pathetic than he already was. I pitied him. He's lost just as much as I have, and he's about to say goodbye to the one person he's been so scared of losing this whole time..
I looked back at Gareth and we stared at one another for a few seconds, me not bothering to answer Gareth's question and I then broke the eye contact we held and looked towards Hannah. I took one last look at her, seeing what I had done and it didn't take me long to get sick of the sight and I turned towards the door.
I unlocked the door and opened it, the sound of the heavy rain and thunder greeting me as I walked out onto the deck and I went to the parking lot, getting into my car and driving home as fast as I could. I could barely breathe, my lungs felt constricted the more I drove and my entire body began to shake. I had killed my wife, shot my brother three times and left him to die, and now I was about to pack everything that I could think of that I would need in order to leave my current life behind and I was going to leave my son with no excuse and without seeing him one last time. I felt like I had a huge weight lifted from my shoulders, glad that I had dealt with everything accordingly, or at least the best outcome I could think of, yet I still couldn't get passed the fact that I was abandoning my child because I was too much of a coward to face what I had done and to accept the consequences. If anything, I should be setting a good example by confessing, turning myself in, letting Oliver hate me for killing his Mother, but I just couldn't bare seeing him again. He was the last person that I wanted to hate me, and although I knew he was going to as soon as he found out what happened tonight, I was too much of a coward to face him and to accept the hate I knew he'd have for me. I couldn't see it in his eyes, I can't..
I pulled into the driveway and bolted out of my car, rushing inside of the house and seeing that the inside was completely dark. It felt so weird being here and not being greeted by Hannah, or Oliver, or Camilla, the house was as dead as my life and it was a good representation of what I had lying before me.. Emptiness.. Darkness.. Everything I never wanted..
I sighed heavily and continued to my bedroom, getting out an 'overnight' bag from under the bed and I began filling it with my clothes from the dresser, going as quickly as I could. I went to my desk next but stopped, looking at the photo upon it and staring at the family I had created here, letting everything sink in more and I couldn't stop looking at it. My heart felt heavy and my body needed to rest, pulling the chair out from the desk and I sat down for a moment, my gaze never leaving the picture and I could feel my eyes beginning to water and soon tears clouded my vision.
I hung my head, letting my tears fall into the insides of my glasses and soon falling to the ground when the tears had pooled enough within the lenses. Bringing my hand to my face, I removed my glasses quickly and chucked them angrily with a quick burst of force across the room, rubbing my eyes then with my other hand and clearing the tears away. I ran my fingers through my hair, struggling to calm down and regain my composure, but how could I at a time like this..?
I took a few slow, deep breaths, trying to regain what little composure I had left in me and I stood up, taking the photo from the desk and tossing it into my bag before closing it up. I looked around the room once more, my vision only slightly blurred, but I could still at least guess what every object was and what significance it once held.. I knew I was going to miss this life, I was going to miss everything about it. Despite all the bad that had happened recently, I couldn't deny that there were some key points within this life that I'd never forget, the happy points.. The days that my brother and I would sit back and relax with a few beers together, telling stories, playing games, or just remembering the past before everything went to shit.. The days I'd spent with Hannah where if she would give me a certain look that only I knew, I swear my heart was going to burst.. The day my son was born and the first squeal of happiness he projected when he saw me for the first time with an accompanied toothless smile.. Those are the little things I'd never forget.
I went to my desk again, grabbing a pen and staring down at a notepad. I needed to say something, anything, I couldn't just leave without a single word to Oliver.. He didn't deserve that. The more I stared at the notepad, the less time I had to make my getaway, so I quickly wrote down the first thing that came to mind when I thought of Oliver and I dropped the pen quickly, rushing to my bag and picking it up, then leaving my bedroom and walking back through the house to leave.
One last look, one last smell, and a few last memories came to me as I stopped and looked back at the dark, empty home..
This was it.. Once I walk out this door, there's no coming back. This was the end of the line for me. I am no longer the same man I was before, I am no longer a part of this life, I no longer have a brother, or a wife, or children, and I am no longer Gibson Aries Dubois.
____________________
End of Generation 3
____________________
Original chapter written and posted on June 24, 2014
No comments:
Post a Comment
We're all a little bit crazy.. What do you think?